It’s Not A Competition

It's Not A Competition

If there’s one thing in life I’ve never understood it’s people going out of their way to try and top something you’ve done in the hope that they’ll be bigger and better than you are. Sometimes even going as far to take your ideas and palm them off as their own to see if they’ll gain more recognition for it than you did. I will never ever know why people can’t just let you have your moment and be happy for you, I suppose it’s quite sad really but it’s also rude and quite upsetting.  Unfortunately though these people don’t seem to understand the effects of what they’re doing especially when it comes to taking something you’ve put so much time and effort in to.

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A Chemical Pregnancy

A Chemical Pregnancy

I told myself last night that I wouldn’t write this post, yet here I am. I’ve realised as the day has gone on that I need to write this, not only for me but because when I started this blog I promised I’d be honest about documenting my journey and if I don’t write it then I’m not being completely honest with anyone.

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Infertility and My Mental Health

Infertility and My Mental Health

It’s no secret that I’ve battled with depression and anxiety since the age of about 13 years old. The depression would come and go whenever it saw fit and eventually left me alone in 2015. My anxiety however has remained a constant for the last ten years. Most days are pretty manageable but others are crippling where even getting out the door becomes the hardest thing in the world. I can’t go to new places alone, I’m yet to join everyone from work on a night out, and I would rather the ground opened up and swallowed me instead of having to meet someone new but that’s just who I am now.  Recently though the depression has made it’s way back in, but this time things are different and I know exactly what’s caused it… our good ‘friend’ infertility.

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Listen Up!

Listen Up Resolve

This week (23rd – 29th April) is National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW) in the US which was founded by Resolve. Although I live in the UK it is clearly something I am passionate about so I’m taking part too! Their theme this year is “Listen Up!” encouraging people to listen up and take notice of the issues surrounding infertility and family building. As someone who has been very vocal about their infertility struggles it makes sense for me to join in and talk about the importance of speaking up and how we need to be heard.

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Clearing Our Minds With A Day Trip To Brighton

Clearing Our Minds With A Day Trip To Brighton

Over the last few months Mitch and I have had a fair amount to deal with. We moved away from everyone we know, started new jobs, planning the wedding, we were given more infertility heartbreak, the car has needed some serious fixing, and the list goes on really. As always though we’ve been pushing onward with everything and just getting on with life, and clearly decided that that wasn’t enough for us so added more stress too!

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“I Know How It Feels, It Took Us Six Months To Conceive”

I Know How You Feel It Took Us 6 Months To Conceive

Please don’t get me wrong, I know that the following sentence is meant with all the love, goodwill, and sympathy in the world, and I know that people are just trying to relate and help you feel less alone. However, “I know how it feels, it took us *insert months here* to conceive” is one of those sentences that makes me want to get up and scream “IT’S NOT THE SAME” very loudly in your face. I know you’re just trying to relate to what’s going on in my life, and I know it’s because you haven’t been through it that you’re desperately searching for the right words to say, but just please don’t say anything.

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“You never know…”

Infertility You Never Know

Having received an amazing response from my “Why Don’t You Just Adopt?” post, I’ve decided to write in more detail about the things listed in my “What Not To Say To A Woman Suffering With Infertility” post. Initially I only skimmed over them briefly and somewhat sarcastically, mostly because I think some of them were still raw and painful. I’ve since realised though that they all need proper acknowledgement. While these may be the first sentences that come to peoples minds as a way of support, the reality is that they hurt and they aren’t okay to say. My aim here is to educate people who have never experienced infertility and help them understand what is and isn’t okay to say, but I also want those struggling with infertility to feel less alone. I want them to be able to read this and see that there are people out there who are told the same things they are, and that they aren’t overreacting when they get upset over something that’s been said.

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Deciding To Speak Up

Deciding To Speak Up

For this post I’m going to be stepping away from my usual theme of infertility, although rest assured I’ll be back to normal after this post is done. I just need to get something off my chest. However, I should warn that this post may be uncomfortable and triggering for some people.

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